Vodka seltzer is the drink of the summer, reviewed
Also, there's raspberry jam inside.
Monday, I watched a woman on TikTok spoon raspberry-lychee preserves into a cup of cloudy ice cubes. She poured lime La Croix over it, clinking the mixture as she turned it with a glass straw, and declared the pink liquid the drink of the summer.
Tonight, I did what she did except I added vodka and I had two of them. This alcohol was a 10 out of 10.
I haven’t been going out at all recently, really. Since getting Covid in March, I’ve felt like my true self is locked away somewhere deep in my chest, which still hurts.
In being inside so often, I’ve had time under my blanket to mesh with my memories and old feelings.
Like, I’ve been thinking about the summer I worked at the library. I sat in stale air conditioning all day and watched dirty windows turn orange, then pink. As the sun set, students sat still in the air conditioning with their loose tank tops, their coffee cups sweating as they glanced at another page and flirted with the idea of a new tab. When they left, my friend would drive me to dinner, and I’d cry in her car. But it felt good, having nothing else to do except cry.
And I’ve been remembering how grass smelled when I felt like I was in love for the first time. Sweet. Wet. Full.
My memories are always better than the real thing, especially when the real thing, right now, is being too afraid to go outside. Being afraid to go outside is a vibe that is a one out of 10, I have discovered.
But also while inside, I’ve finally found the time to think about this haircut. What is it?
Who is this?
Notice how his shirt says “ur luv’d<3." I believe this is a message for me.
As far as lice attendance goes — these hairs look conditioned and well-maintained. I think if they were to be filled with lice, though, the lice would have a lot of space to populate, and so there would be, if I had to guess, upwards of 10,000 lice, not including their children. So that’s a 10 out of 10 on the lice front.
:D
Just some quick word association with this haircut: pizza, pizza bowl, Gillette shaving cream for sensitive faces, leap frog, “Ooh, I’m blinded by the lights” by The Weeknd, the lamp with a missing shade you see on the sidewalk, John Stamos if he accessed time travel technology and peddled a discount code for compression socks at the Gap.
Yes. That’s what I was thinking.
Vodka seltzer with raspberry jam earns a final score of seven out of 10. Vodka seltzer with raspberry jam is the drink of the summer.